Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Golden thongs, porn mustaches and banging like a porn star - why you should vote for Jason Giambi in the final vote


Is anyone else surprised by the sudden fan support for a man who just months ago was the whipping boy for an underachieving offense?

I'm certainly not criticizing -this blog has long been a supporter of the 'stache. All season long, he has been one of the Yankees' most productive hitters.

According to MLB.com, this "Final Vote" thing is really gaining some momentum. Sadly, the Big G is in third place with one day to go.

Here are the main competitors in the order of votes received :

Evan Longoria: Evan Longoria? Do you mean Eva Longoria? HAHA their names sound alike. He must suck. Actually, no, he is the leading rookie of the year candidate, and has been a key component in the upstart Rays' success. I'll pass.

Jermaine Dye: All this guy is famous for is breaking his leg in the playoffs by fouling a pitch off of it. Actually, he has been a pretty good major league player for a while now, and is having an unexpectedly great season and is a major reason why the Ozzie Guillens are shocking some people in the AL Central. Nah, not for me, too boring.

Jason Giambi: So what if he did steroids once in a while. Lets focus on the positives here - he has managed to grow a porn 'stache that is unrivaled in recent sports history. Blogs have been born of it. He speaks of himself in a strange third person voice referring to the "Big G". He wears a golden thong when he is in a slump. He made the phrase "Hit like an all-star, party like a rock star and bang like a porn star" famous in the world of sports. Who cares how he plays baseball? This guy is great at life. He gets my vote 100 times over (seriously, I was bored at work today and must have voted 100 times. You can do the same at the top of this post).

Ok, I guess I have to make a statistical argument. Here goes:

Giambi
OPS + = 148
VORP = 25.6

Longoria
OPS+ = 136
VORP = 23.8

Dye
OPS+ = 136
VORP = 25.5

Does he have an overwhelming advantage over those guys? Not at all. However, after outlining the above, I think we all know that voting for Jason Giambi is the way to go.

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